Let go
by aznjtgirl
Summary: He pulled her to him as close as humanly possible. She pulled him down to her, as if he would never be close enough. Nejiten oneshot CoF series


So I was bumming around my room and I'd been reading a lot of Nejiten angst lately and this came to me. yeah, i've been in a pretty lonely mood lately -.- but whatever, this is dedicated to J, my first boyfriend and best friend...because he is my Neji, though I'd never tell him.

It's really rough and emotional...I kind of just wrote it without thinking. Sorry if the ending is awk, I wasn't sure how to end it. Angst galore.

disclaimer: don't own naruto or any of the characters.

* * *

"Do you think we'll still be friends after…you know…"

And he did know. He would get married in two days; in fact, being here was against the rules, but he didn't care. It was a nightmare; he'd have to marry some woman for the clan's best interest, the elders said. Of course Hinata's marriage was approved; it didn't get any better than marrying the Hokage himself. Neji, on the other hand, was unable to pick his wife.

He stared at her with sober eyes. There was no way to tell her that he seriously doubted their friendship would last too long. Hiashi was fighting the elders for him, saying that Tenten was his teammate, but the elders feared infidelity from him. He loved Tenten like no other and knew that if he continued to see her after his marriage, even as just friends, their fears would come true. It was already hard enough sitting here with her without doing anything. His silvery eyes looked up at her from his position in her lap.

"I mean…we don't have to, I just thought it'd be nice," she said casually, but Neji could hear the underlying tone of worry and anxiety. She was beautiful, he thought, and deserved so much better. He didn't say anything as he gripped her hand in his.

They looked at each other in silence, knowing the truth. She smiled sadly at him, understanding that this was probably one of the last times she'd be able to be with him like this. There was no way he could escape the marriage and no way she would force him to; she understood his loyalty to his clan, albeit a reluctant loyalty. She removed her hand from his to run her fingers through his long dark hair.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. She shook her head, knowing that he meant it with all his heart. His apology only made it that much harder for what would come. She couldn't spend her life wanting something that she could have had, that would never be hers. She looked into the light eyes that stared longingly into hers.

He sat up to face her. There was no way he could really be that handsome, she thought. His graceful demeanor mixed masculinity made her want to melt. He was hers, her mind said angrily, not that stupid woman's. She gave the same sad smile, hoping that her anger and jealous didn't show through.

He reached up and tugged the ribbons from her hair. The buns gave way to curls from being up all day. She shook her hair out, trying to make it at least look presentable. He gave her one of his rare smiles; how could one person be so utterly captivating? She was his, he thought possessively, his and no one else's.

"Will you remember me, once you're…"

"Always."

Their lips met in rough passion. He pulled her to him, arms quickly going around her waist. Her own hands went to encircle his neck. He pulled her as close as humanly possible. She pulled him down to her, as if he would never be close enough.

The heated kisses continued, his lips sliding slowly over hers. She pressed herself into him, relishing the feel of his muscular, but lean figure. Her fingers tangled themselves in his hair and she clutched the strands tightly. He pulled her to him as he leaned back, both of them falling to the grassy floor.

"Neji," she breathed, panting from the loss of oxygen. The intensity of her gaze told him all he needed to know; she loved him and always would, regardless of what would happen.

He said her name in an equally quiet tone. She kissed his cheek gently, knowing that all of this would only hurt them later. He was quiet, pensive at her movement, understanding her thoughts as they mirrored his own.

Suddenly, he snapped. It didn't matter that he was getting married in less than 100 hours, that there were people waiting for him. All he wanted was her, to feel her, to love her. He kissed her hungrily, more urgently than before. She gasped at his aggressiveness, allowing his tongue to explore her mouth properly. He rolled her over, so that she was on her back.

"Neji," she murmured against his lips between kisses. "Neji, I…"

"I know," he said. "I know."

Tears formed in her eyes as she looked at him with utter longing mixed with passion and heat. Her normally cinnamon brown eyes had darkened with desire and it was all he could do not to take her then and there.

"Do you regret it?" He knew she was talking about falling for her. He kissed her again, showing her that no, he didn't regret it. In his opinion, she was probably the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Slowly, he moved down to her neck, a trail of kisses following him. She ran her hands through his hair again, gently massaging his scalp.

It wasn't like she hadn't ever done things like this before, or him. Both of them had been on missions that had involved seduction and both had gone through with it. But this was different; it wasn't just lust and passion, it was love too.

Neji continued to kiss her as she pressed her lips to the top of his head. Both were too far gone to care that others were waiting for them; all that mattered was the other person.

Then Neji regained control of himself. "I'm sorry," he said with hard breathing. He didn't even want to look at her; he was scared of what she would say.

"Don't apologize," she said softly. She hadn't wanted him to stop, but she knew it was inevitable; he was an honorable person, at least around her.

"I'm sorry," he said again, this time looking at her. She gave him a gentle smile and leaned forward to give him a quick kiss.

Then he sat up, allowing her to sit up to. They gazed into each other's face, understanding the longing and the pain. She leaned forward to give him a kiss on the cheek, as she had done before.

"I have no choice," he told her, knowing that she already knew. She cupped his face with one hand, knowing that he was right. Her silence told him she understood his predicament, that she didn't blame him.

"Tenten," he started.

"Don't…I…just don't," she said quietly. She stood up and offered her hand up to him. He took it quietly and kissed her when he too was standing straight.

They stood there, quietly soaking each other in, knowing that this would be the last time they would see each other. Then they left the clearing in opposite directions, not looking back at the other, for they knew that life had pulled them apart for a reason. Whatever reasoning the gods had decided should have been sufficient.

Two days later, Tenten sat crying in her room as Neji said 'I do' to a woman he didn't want.

Fate was cruel.

* * *

Well there you have it -.- I can't believe I just did that. I feel awful, making things turn out that way :( oh well. Review, if you would.


End file.
